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Old 02-17-2006, 11:44 AM   #1
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lots of em

auntie karen

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment... Get their
parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their

Ashley said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying

One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front
seat of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs
went flying and broke and made a mess."

"What's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher.

"Don't put all your eggs in one basket!"

"Very good," said the teacher.

Next little Sarah raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers
too. But we raise chickens for the meat market.

We had a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten
live chicks, and the moral to this story is, "don't count your
chickens before they're hatched."

"That was a fine story Sarah. Michael, do you have a story to

"Yes, my daddy told me this story about my Aunt Karen.

Aunt Karen was a flight engineer in the Gulf War and her plane was

She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a
bottle of whisky, a machine gun and a machete.

She drank the whisky on the way down so it wouldn't break and then
she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops.

She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of

Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade broke.
Then she killed the last ten with her bare hands."

"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "what kind of moral did
your daddy tell you from that horrible story?"

"Stay the fuckkk away from Aunt Karen when she's been drinking".
[COLOR="Lime"][B]Highway HorrorS c.c.[/B][/COLOR]

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Old 02-17-2006, 11:45 AM   #2
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Old 02-17-2006, 01:59 PM   #3
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Old 02-17-2006, 02:02 PM   #4
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