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Old 02-22-2008, 12:22 PM   #1
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HAHA!! just got this joke off myspace

I knew it was going to happen, but we just didn't know when. Here it is! Men's answer to Maxine.
Meet ------- MAX

Men strike back!
How many men does it take to open a beer?�
None. It should be opened when she brings it.

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?�
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.

Why do women have smaller feet than men?�
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows�
Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?�
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me."

How do you fix a woman's watch?�
You don't There is a clock on the oven.

Why do men pass gas more than women?�
Because women can't shut up long enough to�
Build up the required pressure.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?�
A woman who won't do what she's told

I married a Miss Right.�
I just didn't know her first name was Always.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake

Why do men die before their wives?�
They want to.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

In the beginning, created the earth and rested.
Then created Man and rested.
Then created Woman.
Since then, neither nor Man has rested.

Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women who can handle the truth!
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Old 02-22-2008, 01:23 PM   #2
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2006 Honda 599

Here's another one for ya!

A man and a woman were driving down the road arguing about his deplorable fidelity practices when suddenly, the woman reaches over and slices off the mans and angrily tosses it out the window of the car.

Driving behind the car is a pickup truck with a man and his 10 year old daughter chatting away beside him. All of the sudden, the smacks the pickup in the windshield and flies off.

Surprised, the daughter asks her daddy, "Daddy what in the heck was that ?!?"

Not wanting to expose his 10 year old daughter to at such a tender age, the father replies, "It was only a bug, honey."

The daughter gets a confused look on her face, and after a minute, she says. "Sure had a big ."
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Old 02-22-2008, 01:42 PM   #3
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i just snorted laughing so hard at that one!
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