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Old 02-20-2006, 02:27 PM   #1
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For the Hormone Hostages.....

AKA the married ones......

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a
man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his very life into his own

This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in
the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant other!!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: What did I do wrong?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
ULTRASAFE: Here's fifty dollars, here's some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some more chocolate.

13 Things PMS Stands For:

1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff........And my favorite one...
13. Potential Murder Suspect

Another thing to giggle about... A husband, not happy with his wives mood
swings, bought her a mood ring the other day so he would be able to
monitor her moods. When in a good mood, it turns green. When in
a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time
he'll buy a diamond ring.........
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits
--Albert Einstein
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Old 02-20-2006, 02:36 PM   #2
Holy Smokes!
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Open your eyes and reclaim the freedom you were born with. - Moody
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Old 02-20-2006, 04:28 PM   #3
Bevo's royal guard.
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Puffy Mid-Section
Originally Posted by Godsuki
I am going to kiss your my friend!!!!

Originally Posted by NY Weird Lady
Mucus Membrane!
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Old 02-20-2006, 05:46 PM   #4
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lots of em

that was funny, I read them to the wifey.

For the Hormone Hostages.....
[COLOR="Lime"][B]Highway HorrorS c.c.[/B][/COLOR]

I respect scootertrash because well... He's like the Jesus of building and fixing .
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Old 02-20-2006, 07:08 PM   #5
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This can also mean the same as your favorite

Pack My Suitcase lol
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Old 02-20-2006, 07:22 PM   #6
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This thread was funny, but I took the advise for real,
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Old 02-20-2006, 07:26 PM   #7
No likey, no bikey
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'04 600rr Eurobet (sold)
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poor married guys....why do y'all deal with the woman's sheet!

i mean i'm sure i'm gonna get married too, but ....stuff like that doesnt really make me wanna tie the knot.
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