Register Members List Member Map Media Calendar Garage Forum Home Mark Forums Read

Go Back > Off Topic (everything else) > Off Topic
Forgot info?

Welcome to! You are currently viewing our forums as a guest which gives you limited access to the community. By joining our free community you will have access to great discounts from our sponsors, the ability to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content, free email, classifieds, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, join our community!

Register Today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.

Like us on Facebook! Regular shirt GIVEAWAYS and more


Share This Thread: 
Subscribe to this Thread Thread Tools
Old 01-11-2006, 12:13 PM   #1
Motorcycle School
FastLine's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: MSRH GSS TWS (Texas World Speedway)
Feedback Rating: (0)
Posts: 13,881

Experience: 10+ years
Trackdays: 10+



The Guys' Rules

At last a guy has taken the
time to write this all down.

Finally, the guys' side of the story.
(I must admit, it's pretty good.)

We always hear"the rules"
from the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note...
these are all numbered "1"

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports.
It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become
null and void after7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the
Victoria's Secret girls,
don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don 't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something
or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it,
just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible,
please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example,
is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying,
but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't
want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear
is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as
baseball, the shotgun formation,
or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.
Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know,
I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.
FastLine is offline   Reply With Quote
Similar Topics
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
+1 For the Good Guys. -$11M For the Bad Guys! FlipSideUp The Circus 34 11-05-2007 09:45 AM
Phiddy guys/dirtbike guys...NEED HELP!!! Solracer How To's and Q & A's 29 03-17-2007 10:48 PM
guys gf gets puched....whoops both guys flip326 Off Topic 5 10-01-2006 10:58 PM
OH HOLY KRAP YOU GUYS YOU GUYS... Ramius Off Topic 14 04-11-2006 08:11 PM
Old 01-11-2006, 03:25 PM   #2
the necessary villain
fuknrobert's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The Hideout
Feedback Rating: (1)
Posts: 14,959

Experience: 5 years
Trackdays: 10+

'04 R6, '05 70, '04 fiddy!


i liked number 1

Originally Posted by bentgixxer
im not a midget , i was actually born with a type of dwarfism, but i took medication for 12 yrs to reach just 5'6"
fuknrobert is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2006, 03:41 PM   #3
It means Better Than Ezra
Btrthnezr3's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Nacogdoches
Feedback Rating: (0)
Posts: 564

Send a message via AIM to Btrthnezr3
Haha...that's hillarious.
Btrthnezr3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2006, 05:18 PM   #4
Agent PIMP
DuBwEaR's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Houston-Med Center
Feedback Rating: (0)
Posts: 2,326

2003 Kawasaki Ninja ZX7R

Member Garage

so true
2003 Kawasaki Ninja ZX7R
1995 Honda Shadow VLX
2004 Nissan Frontier XE
DuBwEaR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2006, 06:41 PM   #5
Motorcycles Unlimited
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Houston
Feedback Rating: (2)
Posts: 16,358

Experience: 10+ years
Trackdays: 10+

'14 Speed Triple R, '82 CB900F, '13 Streetglide

Last but not least, anything can always be made better by giving us a !

Call or PM for the BEST PRICES in Houston for PARTS and ACCESSORIES.

NEED GEAR? We have a great selection in stock but if we need to order it we GUARANTEE FIT!
Where Houston riders go to have their bikes worked on, done right the first time!


1964 FM 1960 West
Houston, TX 77090
Hours: Tues.-Fri. 9:30-6:00 Sat. 9-5:30
Patrick is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2006, 07:21 PM   #6
Posts: n/a

Member Garage

Originally Posted by Patrick
Last but not least, anything can always be made better by giving us a !
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2006, 07:29 PM   #7
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: richmond
Feedback Rating: (0)
Posts: 54

01 F4I 600

I say..GIGGADY...YEA! to a b/job well done...
QUACKMIRE is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2006, 08:47 PM   #8
tahitianprincess's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Cypress
Feedback Rating: (0)
Posts: 227

Experience: 5 years
Trackdays: 6

Ninja 250 06
nxt will be Kawi ZX-10R

would you like a woman advice ? ahahahhaha
tahitianprincess is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2006, 11:43 PM   #9
Bevo's royal guard.
hotcknstrips's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Tomball
Feedback Rating: (8)
Posts: 15,687

Experience: 7 years
Trackdays: 7

09 Buell 1125CR

A woman's advice?? we all know women don't give advice, they give you freaking instructions! the wrong instructions, that is.

And yeah, amen to a BJ.....BJ....BJ..............................BJ... .man, that got me thinking.
Originally Posted by Godsuki
I am going to kiss your my friend!!!!

Originally Posted by NY Weird Lady
Mucus Membrane!
hotcknstrips is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2006, 02:57 PM   #10
Post Crusader
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Medical Center
Feedback Rating: (2)
Posts: 417

20th Ann. GSX-R 600

Send a message via AIM to Robopath
every single one of those is perfectly true.
Stern. . . Stern but fair.
4 8 15 16 23 42
Robopath is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2006, 09:06 PM   #11
marlboroman71818's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: baytown
Feedback Rating: (0)
Posts: 879

05 busa

Member Garage

Send a message via AIM to marlboroman71818
:laughing6 :notworthy thats awsome
marlboroman71818 is offline   Reply With Quote

Thread Tools


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:22 PM. is not responsible for the content posted by users.
Privacy Policy