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Old 02-12-2008, 09:53 AM   #1
cogs69
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The Good Husband

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all.
He didn't even remember how he got home from the party.
As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table.
And, next to them, a single red rose!! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.

Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:
"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight.
I love you, darling!
Love, Jillian"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper.

His 16 year old son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son... what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.

Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean?

I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??"

His son replies, "Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, I'm married!!" !

Broken Coffee Table $239.99
Hot Breakfast $4.20
Two Aspirins $.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time. . PRICELESS
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if 100 people tell you that you're a fuhking idiot...odds are your a fuhking idiot.

Last edited by cogs69; 02-12-2008 at 09:55 AM. Reason: left the bottom part off
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Old 02-12-2008, 09:56 AM   #2
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repost 1000x

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Old 02-12-2008, 09:59 AM   #3
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repost 1000x

:dontknow: I searched the title. Nothing came up.
FTRP!!
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if 100 people tell you that you're a fuhking idiot...odds are your a fuhking idiot.
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:00 AM   #4
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:01 AM   #5
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..
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if 100 people tell you that you're a fuhking idiot...odds are your a fuhking idiot.
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:10 AM   #6
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that is very sweet
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:24 AM   #7
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i hadnt heard it b4.... so
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:26 AM   #8
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I love it!
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:27 AM   #9
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haha BC :
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if 100 people tell you that you're a fuhking idiot...odds are your a fuhking idiot.
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:36 AM   #10
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Good one cogs,
I've never heard it either
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:37 AM   #11
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interweb noobs

You guys don't get emails either huh?
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:39 AM   #12
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interweb noobs

You guys don't get emails either huh?
:/: what is this "email" u speak of??
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:40 AM   #13
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interweb noobs

You guys don't get emails either huh?
5000 miles away and on dial-up !! it takes awhile
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:41 AM   #14
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i've read it before, still funny...
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Old 02-12-2008, 11:35 AM   #15
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I've never read it before, but it's cute. aww.
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Old 02-12-2008, 12:29 PM   #16
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im going to have to remember that
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It makes me cry, but real tears not the ones out of my like usual.
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Old 02-12-2008, 12:33 PM   #17
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A woman wrote that joke. No man in the world would say that when he's drunk.
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Old 02-12-2008, 12:35 PM   #18
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Quote:
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A woman wrote that joke. No man in the world would say that when he's drunk.
Now why you gotta ruine it? See I agree with Cherub, I'm gonna remember that. So WE are the kind that WOULD say it.
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if 100 people tell you that you're a fuhking idiot...odds are your a fuhking idiot.
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Old 02-12-2008, 12:41 PM   #19
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Quote:
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Now why you gotta ruine it? See I agree with Cherub, I'm gonna remember that. So WE are the kind that WOULD say it.
Only if you're not TOO drunk to remember!

Besides the fact that if I had to drag any drunk a$$ up to bed, he would be sleeping where he fell...
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Old 02-12-2008, 12:45 PM   #20
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Only if you're not TOO drunk to remember!

Besides the fact that if I had to drag any drunk a$$ up to bed, he would be sleeping where he fell...
lol, never been to drunk to remember, but have passed out, and my wife will bring me a blanket, bowl, water, and aspirin where I lay. She even takes my boots off for me.
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