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Old 06-04-2007, 10:45 AM   #1
Brena23
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A little laughter for the morning

>Man: Where have you been all my life?
>Woman: Hiding from you.

>Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
>Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

>Man: Is this seat empty?
>Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

>Man: Your place or mine?
>Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

>Man: So, what do you do for a living?
>Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

>Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
>Woman: Do not enter.

>Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
>Woman: Unfertilized.

>Man: Your body is like a temple.
>Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

>Man: I would go to the end of the world
for you.
>Woman: But would you stay there?

>Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
>Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

>Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and
i together
>Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together
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If I hate you because you're a stupid then I just hate you. If I hate you because you're a specific skin color then I'm a racist. It really is that simple.

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Old 06-04-2007, 11:02 AM   #2
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thats just wrong
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Old 06-04-2007, 11:03 AM   #3
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hahahahahaha :laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6
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Old 06-04-2007, 11:05 AM   #4
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yawn
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Old 06-04-2007, 11:53 AM   #5
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lol
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It makes me cry, but real tears not the ones out of my like usual.
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Old 06-04-2007, 11:55 AM   #6
Brena23
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figure it was my turn to post something up since yall are always putting up knocking us women
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Originally Posted by kibitzer View Post
If I hate you because you're a stupid then I just hate you. If I hate you because you're a specific skin color then I'm a racist. It really is that simple.

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Old 06-04-2007, 12:04 PM   #7
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How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?

When she starts her sentence with , "A man once told me... "


i dont think a man told you any of that....
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:06 PM   #8
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just liek a ..




A young married woman was discussing her life with a girlfriend.
The girlfriend asked, "Do you talk to your husband when you're making
love ?"

She thought about it a minute then said, "Well, no. But I could. I
mean he has a cell phone and all now."
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:08 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Unassailable
just liek a ..




A young married woman was discussing her life with a girlfriend.
The girlfriend asked, "Do you talk to your husband when you're making
love ?"

She thought about it a minute then said, "Well, no. But I could. I
mean he has a cell phone and all now."
rofl :laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:08 PM   #10
Brena23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Unassailable
How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?

When she starts her sentence with , "A man once told me... "


i dont think a man told you any of that....
Awww dont be mad You know I wouldnt say MOST of that to you
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kibitzer View Post
If I hate you because you're a stupid then I just hate you. If I hate you because you're a specific skin color then I'm a racist. It really is that simple.

Satan ButtNuggets Mothernugget
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:09 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brena23
Awww dont be mad You know I wouldnt say MOST of that to you
most?
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:09 PM   #12
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A woman walks into a hardware store and says "I want to buy a hinge."
The clerk says "Do you wanna screw for that hinge?"
The woman says, "No, but I'll blow you for the toaster."
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:10 PM   #13
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A little boy walks up to his father and says, "Dad, what does a *****
look like?"
Father responds, "well son, before or after ?"
Son, "Well, before?"
Father, "picture a tulip with all the petals son."
Son, "well what about after?"
Father, "Picture a bull dog eating mayonnaise!"
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:10 PM   #14
Brena23
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Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
>Woman: Unfertilized.


Yea this one I would have to agree with 1000%
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kibitzer View Post
If I hate you because you're a stupid then I just hate you. If I hate you because you're a specific skin color then I'm a racist. It really is that simple.

Satan ButtNuggets Mothernugget
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:11 PM   #15
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Q: What is the difference between a single 40-year-old
woman and a single 40-year-old man? A: The 40-year-old woman thinks
often of having children and the man thinks often about dating them.
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:11 PM   #16
Brena23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Unassailable
A little boy walks up to his father and says, "Dad, what does a *****
look like?"
Father responds, "well son, before or after ?"
Son, "Well, before?"
Father, "picture a tulip with all the petals son."
Son, "well what about after?"
Father, "Picture a bull dog eating mayonnaise!"
That is sooooo wrong
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kibitzer View Post
If I hate you because you're a stupid then I just hate you. If I hate you because you're a specific skin color then I'm a racist. It really is that simple.

Satan ButtNuggets Mothernugget
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:12 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Unassailable
A little boy walks up to his father and says, "Dad, what does a *****
look like?"
Father responds, "well son, before or after ?"
Son, "Well, before?"
Father, "picture a tulip with all the petals son."
Son, "well what about after?"
Father, "Picture a bull dog eating mayonnaise!"
hahaha
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:13 PM   #18
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A group of guys and one girl are sitting together at a ball game.
During the game the guys notice the girl knew just as much
about the game as themselves, and are really impressed. After
the game they ask her, "How is it that you know so much
about baseball?"

She says, "Well, I used to be a guy and got a change."

The guys are amazed, but very curious about the process.

"What was the most painful part of the process? Was it when
they cut IT off?"

"That was very painful, but was not the most painful part."

"Was it when they cut off your ?"

"That was very painful, but was not the most painful part."

"What was the most painful part?"

"The part that hurt the most was when they cut my salary in
half!"
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:15 PM   #19
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Why do they call it PMS?

Mad Cow disease was already taken.
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Old 06-04-2007, 12:15 PM   #20
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What has a woman got in common with a box of Kentucky Fried Chicken?

Once you get past the tender breast and the juicy thigh, all you're left
with is a greasy box.
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