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Old 05-16-2007, 10:44 AM   #1
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Pooping while at work

Ever have to go while ur at work but certain things stop you from doing so? For example, you work with a co worker who you have a crush or like and you're like "i have to go potty" then come back in like 15 mins or so and she gives u a funny look... or the rest room is all nasty due to the fact that you have messy people who can't keep clean. you work at a job place where u have some stupid customer ramble on about BS at a time where u really have to go ! pooping at your job place... any funny stories or feelings you would like to share? i'm gonna go now..:notworthy
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:45 AM   #2
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:47 AM   #3
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Nope i dont sweat it i just do the do.
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:47 AM   #4
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Could you think of anything weirder to talk about this morning?
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:47 AM   #5
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ummmm.....ok. :confused1
luckily i work 2 min from home so i dont have this problem. :icon_bigg
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:51 AM   #6
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i work 24 hr shifts. eventually your gonna have to chunk a duece at the station.

all you can do is move quickly, and hope no one calls 911 while your in the middle of it.
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:51 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brena23
Could you think of anything weirder to talk about this morning?
You don't get morning poos? sometimes you run a bit late and can't take care of your business in the mornin so ur kinda stuck at work or commute.
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:52 AM   #8
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I worked with a guy who used to get naked in the stall before he'd . We all knew this because you walk in the bathroom, and there are his clothes sitting on the floor!!! "Dude, what the are you doing?" "Just takin' a man!" he says.....effin' classic!!!

NOTE: if you feel the need to undress completely, while at your place of work, to , then you are a weird !!!!!!
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:53 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bentgixxer
i work 24 hr shifts. eventually your gonna have to chunk a duece at the station.

all you can do is move quickly, and hope no one calls 911 while your in the middle of it.
that must be crazy.. so when ur partner smells like doodoo then u know he didn't have time to wipe or umm had an accident of his own...
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:54 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bentgixxer
i work 24 hr shifts. eventually your gonna have to chunk a duece at the station.

all you can do is move quickly, and hope no one calls 911 while your in the middle of it.


:laughing6 :laughing6 I am sorry but you are gonna have to wait just a little bit longer... Cant leave just yet :laughing6 :laughing6
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:54 AM   #11
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We've all been there but don't like to admit it.We've all kicked back in
our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POO is inevitable.

For those who hate pooing at work, following is the Survival Guide for
taking a dump at work.

CROP DUSTING
When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the smell is not in
your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it camefrom. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled.
Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.

FLY BY
The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooing.Walk in and check for
other pooers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER.

FREQUENT FLYER.
People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the
bathroom.

ESCAPEE
A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a
in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If
you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen.
If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal,pretend you did not
hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved.
Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

JAILBREAK
When forcing a poo, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is
usually a side effect of diarrhoea or a hangover. If this should happen,
do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to
spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

COURTESY FLUSH
The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poo hits the water. This
reduces the amount of air time the poo has to stink up the bathroom. This
can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.

WALK OF SHAME
Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk
up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks
in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does
not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.

OUT OF THE CLOSET POOER
A colleague who poos at work and is proud of it. You will often see
an Out Of The Closet Pooer enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine
under his or her arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The
Closet Pooer before entering the bathroom.

THE POOING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N)
A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooing goes
off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of
Out Of The Closet Pooers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.

SAFE HAVENS
A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least
expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite . This
will reduce the odds of a pooer of your entering the bathroom.

BURGLAR
Someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force
the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments
that can occur when taking a poo at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall
until the Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable
eye contact.

CAMO-COUGH
A phoney cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are
in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert
potential Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

ASTAIRE
A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Burglars that you
are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied.
If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooer can poo
in peace.

WATERMELON
A poo that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is
also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a
diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

HAVANA OMELETTE
A case of diarrhoea that creates series of loud splashes in the Toilet
water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using Camo-Cough with an
Astaire.

UNCLE TED
A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended
lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ted
makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait
to poo when the bathroom is empty.This benefits you as well as the other
bathroom attendees.
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:55 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jus10
I worked with a guy who used to get naked in the stall before he'd . We all knew this because you walk in the bathroom, and there are his clothes sitting on the floor!!! "Dude, what the are you doing?" "Just takin' a man!" he says.....effin' classic!!!

NOTE: if you feel the need to undress completely, while at your place of work, to , then you are a weird !!!!!!
I hope somebody takes them on day.
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:57 AM   #13
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:57 AM   #14
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I don't at work or any public bathrooms. I wait until I get home.
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:57 AM   #15
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just courtesy flush and you'll be aight!!!
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Old 05-16-2007, 10:59 AM   #16
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Quote:
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I hope somebody takes them on day.
we tried, he guarded them well!!!!





























(so we only got his pants!!!:laughing6 )
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Old 05-16-2007, 11:00 AM   #17
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Quote:
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we tried, he guarded them well!!!!
How well can u gaurd the things when you are taking a poo?
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Old 05-16-2007, 11:00 AM   #18
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Old 05-16-2007, 11:01 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marimirez
How well can u gaurd the things when you are taking a poo?
Most men are tall enough to reach the ground while sitting on the pot.
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Old 05-16-2007, 11:03 AM   #20
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I put a remote controlled fart machine in the ceiling of the ladies restroom. Whenever I hear them in there, I hit the button, as my office shares a common wall with the restroom. Wonder what they say when they hear that!
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