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Old 02-21-2007, 04:31 PM   #1
Gryphin
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Anger management

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need
to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take
it out on someone you don't know. It all started one day when I was
sitting at my desk and remembered a phone call I had forgotten to make.
I found the number and dialed it.

A man answered, saying, "Hello." I politely said, "This is
Chris. May I please speak with Robin Carter?"

Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe
that anyone could be so rude.

I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had
transposed the last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up
with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.

When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an
!" and hung up.

I wrote his number down with the word '' next to it, and
put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills
or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an !"
It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic
'' calling would have to stop.

So, I called his number and said: "Hi, this is John Smith from
the Telephone Company. I'm just calling to see if you're interested in
the Caller ID program?"

He yelled "NO!" and slammed the phone down.

I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an
!"

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking
spot.

Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I
had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been
waiting for the spot. The idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign
in his car window, so I wrote down his number.

A couple of days later, right after calling the first (I
had his number on speed dial), I thought I had better call the BMW
, too.

I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"

"Yes, it is."

"Can you tell me where I can see it?"

"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street . It's a yellow house, and
the car's parked right out in front."

"What's your name?"

"My name is Don Burgemeyer," he said.

"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"

"I'm home every evening after five."

"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"

"Yes?" "Don, you're an ."

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now,
when I had a problem, I had two to call. But after several
months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be. So, I
came up with an idea. I called #1.

"Hello."

"You're an !" (But I didn't hang up.)

"Are you still there?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"STOP CALLING ME," he screamed.

"MAKE ME," I screamed back.

"Who are you?" he demanded.

"My name is Don Burgemeyer."

"Yeah? Where do you live?"

"I live at 1802 West 34th Street , ! It's a yellow house,
with my black beemer parked in front."

He said, "I'm coming over there right now, Don. And you had
better start saying your prayers."

I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, ."

Then I called #2.

"Hello?" he said.

"Hello, ," I said...again, without hanging up.

He yelled, "IF I EVER FIND OUT WHO YOU ARE!!!"

"Yeah, you'll what?" I said.

"I'll KICK YOUR !!!," he exclaimed. I answered, "Well,
, here's your chance. I'm coming Over right now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I
lived at 1802 West 34th Street , and that I was on my way home to kill
my gay lover.

Then I called Channel 9 News to let them know about the war
going down on West 34th Street I quickly got into my car and headed over
to 34th street .

There I saw two beating the out of each other in
front of six squad cars, a police helicopter, and a news crew.

NOW, I feel better.

Anger management really works!
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Old 02-21-2007, 04:32 PM   #2
Mr. Unassailable
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Old 02-21-2007, 04:35 PM   #3
jus10
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(pssssst.....its an old joke clayton.)
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Old 02-21-2007, 04:56 PM   #4
PimpRice
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wow, that was a VERY long joke, and it wasn't even that good
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Old 02-21-2007, 05:11 PM   #5
hotcknstrips
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it was good, i was laughing
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Old 02-21-2007, 05:31 PM   #6
ScooterTrash
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so old, I kicked the slats out of my crib first time I heard it.
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Old 02-21-2007, 05:36 PM   #7
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midly amusing. you may laugh briefly and quietly.
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