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Old 08-05-2006, 10:45 AM   #1
Gimpin2Fold
Wake up already
 
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hey woman!!!...cook me some dinner!!!

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the
front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
In the beginning, created the earth and rested.
Then created Man and rested.
Then created Woman.
Since then, neither nor Man has rested.
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Old 08-05-2006, 10:56 AM   #2
ScooterTrash
ConroePowderCoating.com
 
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pretty funny stuff
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Old 08-05-2006, 11:14 AM   #3
houseofpaint
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lol freakin hilarious
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Old 08-05-2006, 12:03 PM   #4
civicious
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What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothin...you've already told her twice

---

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two...one to change the lightbulb and one to suck my
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Old 08-05-2006, 12:15 PM   #5
kstrs
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Old 08-05-2006, 12:52 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by civicious
What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothin...you've already told her twice

---

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two...one to change the lightbulb and one to suck my

that's harsh ... either you have no dating life our your married
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Old 08-05-2006, 01:08 PM   #7
civicious
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WFO
that's harsh ... either you have no dating life our your married
eet wahs a yoke, mayne!
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Old 08-05-2006, 01:15 PM   #8
WFO
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:laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6 :laughing6
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Old 08-05-2006, 01:18 PM   #9
ninjaxx
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Why don't women need Hiking boots?
There are no mountains between the kitchen and the bedroom


What do you do when the dishwasher is broken?
Slap her and tell her to get back in the kitchen
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Old 08-05-2006, 02:11 PM   #10
MACK
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PREACH!!! PREACH!!!
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Old 08-05-2006, 02:12 PM   #11
MACK
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ninjaxx
Why don't women need Hiking boots?
There are no mountains between the kitchen and the bedroom


What do you do when the dishwasher is broken?
Slap her and tell her to get back in the kitchen
:confused1 :eh:
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Old 08-05-2006, 02:13 PM   #12
MACK
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Why don't women like engines because the sink dosent come with a radiator.....duuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh.
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Old 08-05-2006, 04:21 PM   #13
hotcknstrips
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I didn't ge
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Quote:
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Mucus Membrane!
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Old 08-05-2006, 10:54 PM   #14
FastLine
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Boss






Why do women wear white wedding dresses?

Because it matches the color of the Kitchen Appliances!
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Old 08-05-2006, 11:19 PM   #15
jetchanic
I fix beer cans that fly!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MACK954
Why don't women like engines because the sink dosent come with a radiator.....duuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh.
that was sad
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Old 08-05-2006, 11:22 PM   #16
jetchanic
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What's the difference between a woman having her period and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.

What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?
A whine and cheese party

The Top 10 reasons why a handgun is better than a woman



#10 - You can trade an old .44 for two new .22s.


#9 - You can keep one handgun at home and have another for
when you're on the road.


#8 - If you admire a friend's handgun, and tell him so, he
will probably let you try it out a few times.


#7 - Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a
backup.


#6 - Your handgun will stay with you even if you're out of
ammo.


#5 - A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.


#4 - Handguns function normally every day of the month.


#3 - A handgun doesn't ask "Do these new grips make me look
fat?"


#2 - A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you
use it.


AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY THAT A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A
WOMAN . . . You can buy a silencer for a handgun.
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Old 08-05-2006, 11:26 PM   #17
jetchanic
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Why is it called PMS? -- Because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken

I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?

What does the Bermuda Triangle and sorority girls have in common?
They've both swallowed a lot of .

Why is a sorority girl like a door ?
'Cause everybody gets a turn.
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Old 08-05-2006, 11:29 PM   #18
train460
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what do u do when u miss your woman?

reload

Michael
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Old 08-06-2006, 03:19 AM   #19
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Best thread eva
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Old 08-06-2006, 03:38 AM   #20
RICKITT
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Really true..
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