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Old 04-17-2006, 03:22 PM   #121
nobike
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Neversatisfied02
Hey guys,
First of all, this is not something i would normally do because i am a strong believer in the fact that personal business does not need to be broadcast to everyone but in this case, i am still up and there is noone i want to talk to right now. I have tons of thoughts running through my head and i cant sleep so this is my last resort. Alright, im going to tell you guys the story without going into explicit detail because that would take too long to do and i would probably end up breaking down here in front of the computer again. Anyways....

I have been dating the same girl for 4 years. I was and am still madly in love with this girl as she was my everything and i honestly thought we would get married one day. I have never felt this way about anyone else before. She was a special person to me and i guess thats why im having such a hard time dealing with this. We went to a party last saturday and she started a fight with me and i left. I went back to pick her up the next day and she was acting really wierd towards me. Anyways, we end up working things out and everything seems to go back to normal on the sunday. I went to work monday at 3:00pm and she calls to tell me she is going to go to my friends house to watch some streetbike videos at 7:00pm with the guys that we hang out with. Well, i told her id rather she not go because i didnt feel comfortable with that but she hung up on me and went anyways. I got off work at 11:30pm and had no intentions of talking to her because of the way she had been treating me. I got a phone call from my buddy on the way home from work at 11:45pm telling me there was a rumor that she had slept with my friend at the party on the saturday night which is the same guy whos house she went to this monday night to watch videos. Well, in a rage, i drove to her house to see that she had just got home from his house and was in her driveway. I got out of the truck and asked her if the rumor was true but she denied it. She swore up and down nothing happened at all. I trusted this girl so i began thinking maybe someone is just starting some . Well, a few things flagged me off that she was hiding something so when i went to work on the tuesday, i didnt talk to her at all. She was calling me over and over again and i didnt pick up. I couldnt trust her that nothing happened and it was too fishy to me that there is a rumor that something happened the night of the party and then she went over to the same guys house 2 days later while im at work and stays there for a long time. I ended up getting off work and long story short, i ended up picking up for her call after about the 15th one in a row. I told her i cant believe what she said and that i think something happened and after about 40 minutes of telling her shes lying and to just tell me the truth, she admits to kissing him and him trying to mess with her at the party but she says she stopped it. Now i know something must have happened at his house because why would she do this and then go to his house again knowing that he tried something with her. Anyways, after another 30 mins of telling her i know something happened, she finally admits that she had with him at his house that night. I broke up with her and have not had anything to do with her since. I cant believe she could do this to me! I have been hearing from her friends that she is so sorry and she will do anything to get me back and that she made a mistake and is willing to do anything in her power to fix things with me. Now, what do yall think?? I know this is a decision i will have to make on my own but i cant stop thinking about it. I want so bad to believe her and take her back but at the same time, she crossed the line bad and i dont know if i could ever forgive her after thinking we were both something special to the other one and now knowing my buddy has been there too. It makes me sick!!! It may sound as though im calm on here to talk about it but im really not. If i didnt post this up, i would probably have gone crazy cause its been the only thing on my mind since i found out and obviously there is noone to talk to at 4:30am.

Anyways, i ended up finding out that she also messed around with one of my other friends while we were broke up a long time ago. She says it didnt go all the way but who knows... I know she also made out with guys while we were broke up here and there but i never thought it was this bad. Especially with me friends! Thats low! Granted, we were broke up at the time but still, if you have feelings for someone, you cant just go do that with someone in such a short time after breaking up. I know i could have never done anything like that no matter how mad i was.

Well, my question is, would you be able to forgive her if you were me? Keep in mind, we have been together for 4 years and i am madly in love with this girl. I am still in shock and denial that this happened but i know that it did because she finally admitted it to me. Can people change after doing such a thing? Is she only sorry that she got caught? I really dont know what to do and im going crazy!! So many different emotions in feeling and i cant help but to talk about it. Deep down i really want to believe that she will change and give her another chance one day but im not sure if she will change. It would be a long time before i could ever take her back after this anyways. I dont want nothing to do with her anytime soon but that doesnt change my feelings. Anyways guys, sorry i had to bring this on here. knows its embarassing to say this happened but im not the one at fault. I didnt even know! Let me know guys!



if u think u will be forgiven if u sleep with other gurls u can get back to her on that.

otherwise man ditch the , 4get the 4years u had 2gether worry abt the 40 yrs ahead of u. :-)

lottsa gurls out there .. :-)

cheers!!
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Old 04-17-2006, 04:57 PM   #122
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Tell her its over and leave her !!!!!!!!! If you have kids with her later down the road and she does it again and you decide you have had enough, you will be stuck paying her car note(child support) And if she wants,married or not(common law marriage) she can take half of everything you own and i think after 10 years you have to pay alimony!!! So dump her and get on with your life!!!!!!!!!
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Old 04-17-2006, 05:27 PM   #123
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Sorry man. You have to stay broken up. That was wise of you. You can't trust her, and she didn't just "make a mistake". She banged your "friend", then went back for a second round, and lied about it right to your face the whole time.

Don't talk to her or contact her in any way, that'll only mess you up. You're not throwing away the last 4 years, she did, when she made the choice to bang your friend two separate times. What's even worse is she planned the second time.

Date other women. If you two really, really love each other, you'll get back together in the future, after all the drama has passed and the pain has healed. But you can't get back together right now. It takes time. But I am certain you can find someone better, who is faithful, and won't bang your friends or set up trysts right in front of your face.

Good luck man.
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Old 04-17-2006, 05:51 PM   #124
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Thanks for the help guys. You guys are really making me feel better about not talking to her ever again. I do still care alot about her and i know this is going to be hard since she lives close by and we go to the same school at the same times and all that stuff but im sure it will get better.

Did i forget to mention that since this, she has not even tried to contact me. She left to go out of town the day after the hit the fan that that was the last time ive talked to her. Now, i dont know if she just hasnt tried getting in touch with me because she has been out of town and shes trying to keep it off her mind while she is away at work or if she just doesnt even give a that she ****ed up. She apparently keeps telling her friends she really wants me back and crys to them but she hasnt attempted to call me once. Maybe she just knows she ****ed up too bad and she would be wasting her time. I really dont know. I would have expected her to call or something after what she did. I know if i would have been in the wrong, i would be calling her to try to fix things or just to try to talk to her. Maybe thats just me but i was assuming she would show a little more remorse or feelings toward me than she has.
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Old 04-17-2006, 05:53 PM   #125
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weird. i think she would be calling too.
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Old 04-17-2006, 05:55 PM   #126
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if she does call ..

dont be a ***** and be all "its ok babe i forgive u" .. pffffft
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Old 04-17-2006, 05:55 PM   #127
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i disagree with everyone, i say forgive her. take her back. and then take her on a vaction to mexico so y'all can spend some quality time together alone. then are some woderful highways out there in the dessert (or desert, whatever). take her on a drive, and when you find a area that is empty, detour off teh road for a while to have a picnic. drug her drink so she passes out after she drinks it, then tie her up and leave her there for the coyotes and wolves.
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Old 04-17-2006, 05:59 PM   #128
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or if that seems kinda extreme, then you can cut out her tounge and sell her to a house deep in mexico. you should gets a good price if she's cute. that way she can get more than she can handle and you get a new motorcycle. and get new friends. the one that ****ed her and the ones that let it happened.
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Old 04-17-2006, 06:01 PM   #129
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shipwreck
i disagree with everyone, i say forgive her. take her back. and then take her on a vaction to mexico so y'all can spend some quality time together alone. then are some woderful highways out there in the dessert (or desert, whatever). take her on a drive, and when you find a area that is empty, detour off teh road for a while to have a picnic. drug her drink so she passes out after she drinks it, then tie her up and leave her there for the coyotes and wolves.
i like the way u think :laughing6

wait is that wrong of me :eh:
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Old 04-17-2006, 06:05 PM   #130
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if u really care for her u also have to think if u can forgive what she did. if u Can't you will keep bringing this up in her face when u fight and that will not do any good.
If u can't forgive it then it will always eat u up inside. Not saying forget.
Your "friends" are not friends but back stabbing bastards. They seen her at a vulnerable (sp) time and took advantage of it. A REAL friend would have talked to here about "YOUR" situation and how to resolve it, not get in her pants.
That person is not your friend and never was.
all about working thru your problems and see if u can work it out. This Incident may get you two to open up about the problems between you and make u 2 closer.
my opinion tho.
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Old 04-17-2006, 06:11 PM   #131
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If she's sleeping around she's:

a) not into you at all, just staying with you out of habit and wanting you to be the one to break it off
b) desperately trying to make you pay attention to her

Either way, she's mentally unstable and not worth your time. I've been there before, it sucks...but you have to cut ties, have a clean break and forget about all the good times you had before the troubles started or you will want to have her back... which is not a good thing.

After a few of these types of experiences you will be wiser and know exactly what to look for. Just think, imagine if you married this chick before you really knew what she was capable of.
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Old 04-17-2006, 06:13 PM   #132
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Quote:
Originally Posted by train460
if u really care for her u also have to think if u can forgive what she did. if u Can't you will keep bringing this up in her face when u fight and that will not do any good.
If u can't forgive it then it will always eat u up inside. Not saying forget.
Your "friends" are not friends but back stabbing bastards. They seen her at a vulnerable (sp) time and took advantage of it. A REAL friend would have talked to here about "YOUR" situation and how to resolve it, not get in her pants.
That person is not your friend and never was.
all about working thru your problems and see if u can work it out. This Incident may get you two to open up about the problems between you and make u 2 closer.
my opinion tho.
+1................friends don't do like that, and you have 4 yrs invested.
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Old 04-17-2006, 06:26 PM   #133
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I know, it could have been even worse if this would have happened down the road. The only thing i keep telling myself is maybe we are young and just got involved too soon for the relationship we were having.

Does anyone think it would ever even be worth looking at fixing one day? Obviously it would have to be after all the current feeling and emotions are gone but if i still have the love for her like i do now and she wants to work on things, do you think it would be possible to get a good relationship back out of it?

BTW, if now, im going to take her to MEXICO!!
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Old 04-17-2006, 06:40 PM   #134
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User is banned

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Old 04-17-2006, 06:41 PM   #135
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^what he said
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Old 04-17-2006, 11:05 PM   #136
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i saw ice age 2 today and the sloth gave some great advice that you can use, "you have to forget about your past to have on with your future" or some corny a$$ $h!+ like that. i still like the mexico idea.
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Old 04-17-2006, 11:17 PM   #137
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Taylor,
Once trust is lost, it is almost impossible to regain completely. No matter how much you care for her, it's always going to be an issue; damaged goods is damaged goods.
The time spent with her is not a waste, just the time you spend thinking about her now that it's over.
Move on, get involved in other aspects of your life, definitely find some new friends.
The sooner you realize that it's not your fault that she was unfaithful, and that what she did is unforgiveable, the sooner you can put it behind you and start moving on with your life.



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Old 04-18-2006, 12:08 AM   #138
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LowNSlowNeon
once a cheater always a cheater...
*coughs..

ahem in case you missed it...

You'll never trust her again man. it will always be in teh back of your head....

Smash her mom and then donkey punch her sister and move on man...
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Old 04-18-2006, 12:14 AM   #139
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we're not married yet...
i tell everyone i am so creepy epimps leave me alone...
.. but the not so creepy ones still have the green light, right? :icon_bigg
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Old 04-18-2006, 01:33 AM   #140
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kids, let DR. broke nasty handle this... first, you must be asian or white, second, what patrick said =) third, my 5 cents we're young, get yourself someone older more mature, and make sure things are mutual between you 2, if not.. expect trouble ahead, love is not your signifigant other, love is commitment. Also, dont open yourself up like that to a girl man when you give her 200% of yourself theyll take it break it in half and hand it back to you, your emotions in a way i guess are seen as a weakness to them so keep to yourself a little more and remember, make sure things are muutual. k im gonna finish this beer now "dont hate em, replace em" =)

your goign through a phase right now man, chemicals in your head.. your body hasa way of balancing itself out.. dont go back to her because you deserve better no matter what how much she apologizes. time heals everything, time is also the only thing that goes up and never comes down..besides the bill for my bike. so i say enjoy it -hiccup- the more your grieve for her, the more she knows she had you by the ,. move on. i did.. you should see the fat bish im boning these days.. 'roberts mom' see then she doesnt have the nerve to cheat cuz she knows she'll never get somone as good looking as me again. woot, theres a bill for this drunken lectrue also. k thanks i love cake
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