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Old 03-24-2006, 03:19 PM   #1
jrock
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Need to lose some weight???

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 9 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads: "If you can catch me, you can have me." Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.

He then calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads: "If you catch me you can have me." Well, he's out the door after her like a shot! This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her; but when he does, it's definitely worth every muscle cramp and wheeze, so for the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program. "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone "This is our most rigorous program." Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years." The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds this huge, muscular, 7ft man standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that read:, "I'm Francis. If I catch you, you're mine!"
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Old 03-24-2006, 03:33 PM   #2
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runnnnn
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Old 03-24-2006, 03:34 PM   #3
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9 year old?
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Old 03-24-2006, 03:38 PM   #4
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yeah, pervert, whats up with a voluptous 9 year old? weirdo












I know he missed the one key
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Old 03-24-2006, 03:45 PM   #5
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Old 03-24-2006, 03:49 PM   #6
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that reminds me of the joe dirt commercial
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Old 03-24-2006, 03:51 PM   #7
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Old 03-24-2006, 06:00 PM   #8
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hahaha! that's a good one.
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Old 03-24-2006, 06:12 PM   #9
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haha awesome
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Old 03-24-2006, 06:14 PM   #10
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haha cute
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Old 03-24-2006, 06:17 PM   #11
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Very cute, except the 9 year old part. Hopefully it was a typo and he meant 19 year old. Cute none the less!:laughing6
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Old 03-24-2006, 06:58 PM   #12
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^^^ lol i didnt see that part .......i can only hope
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Old 03-24-2006, 07:01 PM   #13
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LOL! i love the last part! That's hilarious!
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Old 03-24-2006, 07:10 PM   #14
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yeah I think he means 19 yo
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Old 03-25-2006, 10:09 AM   #15
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omg. that was too funny except it seems he left out the one key ..I'm sure he meant 19.....duhhhh
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Old 03-25-2006, 10:21 AM   #16
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got a number?
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Old 03-25-2006, 12:46 PM   #17
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naw , i lost it running around the block and jumping neighbors fences..whew!!
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Old 03-25-2006, 11:52 PM   #18
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heard it before, but still funny
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Old 03-26-2006, 12:06 AM   #19
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...sign me up!
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Old 03-26-2006, 12:10 AM   #20
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^^^^omg
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